So I approved a comment on one of my bitter posts about Tulsa and felt bad about it. Mainly because my whole Tulsa Sucks campaign was a product of a very dark place I was in and my rants obviously cast unfair dispersions on all Tulsans.
I know or have met too many wonderful sweet decent people to not say that not all citizens of Tulsa are wicked Satan spawn. All businesses in town are not corrupt and worthless.
Further, I thank God Almighty for all that I have and for all things. Easy to say but hard to live, obviously. My anxiety and sadness and anger about what happened comes and goes but I am having more good days than not.
Yesterday, just hanging at La Fortune Park poolside was a good day.
http://soundcloud.com/thetulsandotcom/daniel-tosh-ridiculing-tulsa The audio is great, but you should see the audience absolutely burst out laughing in agreement. Best would be if he were telling you right to your faces! But there you go, it is what it is.
Was the hottest pop star in history in T-town recently? He was? Really? How about that! Totally missed that.
Yes, he was, and apparently he was quite the punk. The wild child would not be dissuaded by Oklahoma’s liquor laws, and was giving the crew at the Mayo quite the hard time. The demands started early in the morning and continued until ohhhhhh about three thirty AM!
The Beeb missed a critical aspect of his quest, neglecting to ask CHICKS for help. The dudes were just not willing to risk jail time for the rapidly-getting-weirder heartthrob. No one told him that his schtick does not work on guys! And does he only roll with children? Surprising that he does not have a goto man for his booze like he does for his smokey-smoke?
His peeps also forgot to tell him that marijuana – aka Mary Jane, weed, reefer – is still quite illegal everywhere in ‘America’ except for Colorado and Washington states. Unclear exactly what transpired on this front except that the Mayo’s stick-in-the-mud management had some words with Beebs about all this rank smoke billowing out of his suite.
Will Beiber find it in his heart to forgive this wretched backwater of banality the outrage of not being liquored up? How powerful is his addiction to the wicked weed? Was this his final visit?
Thursday was a tragic day for Tulsans as the craze, the phenomenon, the juggernaut of entertainment known as Zoanette Johnson from Tulsa was voted off the worse season – or best, depending on how you feel about Honey Boo-boo – of American Idol.
Wednesday’s spirited rendition of What’s Love Got To Do With It was her least awful performance yet, and had the wild crooner strutting about the stage with confidence. But with only five spaces remaining the fluke selection of Zoanette had only so much gas left in the tank, and this trip from T-town took her farther than it did for hundreds of thousands of other contestants.
Even with the loyal support of her ‘poohsnaps,’ the flagging stalwart of competition shows could not muster enough ‘vote for the worse’ interest to keep the Tulsan in the mix. So with one final, sad sigh, America said goodbye to Zoanette. Will she return to Tulsa to resume a singing career, or will we see her next shouting at some unsuspecting slob at Reasors, in all her wild glory?
The larger question is whether her longevity was a sign of the end for Idol, or the cause. While Fox mulls over what to do, they may consider Fox23’s inexplicable snub of Johnson. With a local gyrl in the nationally televised show, KOKI resolutely refused to publish a single story on her fleeting rise to glory. If this is the norm for their affiliates, to ignore local tie-ins to the network’s flagship show, it is no wonder the show is tanking. One could easily take Fox23’s mean spirited snub as tacit acknowledgment that the show’s integrity is suspect, that Johnsons candidacy was a joke designed to drum up interest, a desperate gambit for ratings than a serious singing competition. With so many former contestants contending that the show’s outcome is rigged, Zoanette’s inclusion to the final rounds seems to signify their truthfulness.
Was Fox23 just being lazy? Were they jealous? Afraid to draw attention to the shenanigans for fear of exposing Idols secret? Racist for ignoring the big loud black woman while publishing two stories on that sweet white sixteen year old with Cystic Fibrosis who lasted one third as long as Zoamette?
Obviously the answer is ‘all of the above.’ So farewell Zoanette, we barely knew thee. Good luck, and maybe you will end up somewhere where the people actually care about a local gyrl fighting the odds.
Creaky American Idol has picked the Tulsan with The Mostest to be an Amazon habilitation specialist! And by Amazon we mean larger than life Zoanette Johnson!
Putatively from a city awash with the most musical hipness this side of Enid, the snobs must hate that she was chosen. But we say a star is born! First, Ms. Johnson’s clownish performance had everyone in stitches. Plus, the girl honestly has some real lungs and decent pitch.
Inexplicably, outside of a passing mention on the blog of the Tulsa World blog, her nomination to the final twenty girls – a huge dream to millions upon millions of girls – has not been mentioned by the local media! Can you believe that?
The snobs are such snobs in this place! While Fox 23 has time to publish ‘Life after American Idol’ stories on rejects, Ms. Johnson’s unlikely ascension is neglected!
At least the other three local television franchises have network loyalties to watch out for, but Et Tu, FOX23?
Already vote for the worse activists are pegging her for an early favorite, if she survives. Of course she will embarrass her home city for just a few weeks more, and then the haters can relax. I keep telling you: our local media are absolutely a clubby group of preppies who think they are important because of who they are and what they do. They are sorority chicks and frat boys, and that is not Zoanette, and they hate her.
You go, girl! You show these haters!